


The Spider and the Fly

by orphan_account



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, M/M, gender neutral reader, i dont know what to tag this as, this is post-game pacifist ending fnjgdhjkh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 04:11:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15064874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: You and Connor do some stargazing.





	The Spider and the Fly

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, uh, I know this is like, embarrassingly short and likely Bad. However, this is my first time attempting to write in forever so I’m kinda just testing the waters here.
> 
> I don’t normally share this kind of writing, but fell in love with this android twink just like y’all and figured someone may find this enjoyable.

You weren’t sure if stargazing would be the kind of thing an android would appreciate, but Connor seemed happy to oblige after you’d invited him along.

Fast food wrappers and french fries littered the hood of your truck as just the two of you reclined against the windshield. Parked somewhere at the end of a dirt road that opened into a clearing, the trees dotting the horizon were mere silhouettes at this hour.

The steady song of crickets and soft breeze through the surrounding foliage took the edge off of any nerves you had. Maybe it was kinda corny, but you felt at peace. Your eyes wander over the night sky as Connor pointed out different constellations.

You didn’t know he’d committed anything about astronomy to memory; maybe he’d researched beforehand in preparation for your little hang-out, which would be cute. Or maybe he just knew, using some sort of internal android search engine or something.

Maybe he just really did like stars. _How endearing,_ you can’t help but smile to yourself as he continued listing off recognizable star patterns.

You would hum softly in reply, amused, or make a small joke or comment here and there.

After a while, he grew quiet, both of you watching the stars glitter distantly. You wondered what he was thinking about now.

Breaking the brief silence, you muse aloud, “I really like coming out here every once in a while. It’s nice to get away from the noise of work and the city, you know?” You see him turn to you in your peripheral vision as you continue. “Gives you a moment of peace, to just clear your head or think about life.” 

You tilt your head his way, and offer him a half-smile. “I’m glad you decided to tag along.”

Connor didn’t say anything, simply nodding and smiling in return. He focuses his attention back at the span of stars above. Another moment of silence passes between the two of you, but it’s not uncomfortable. The deviant’s mind starts to drift elsewhere.  
_A moment of peace… to think about life._

He’d been doing a lot of thinking lately, worrying in fact, about life. After discovering his deviancy and being fully awakened to emotions, life seemed a whole new level of… complicated. He could analyze and reconstruct crime scenes effortlessly; completing a mission and following orders was second nature. But emotions and feelings were uncharted, terrifying territory. He didn’t understand them, sometimes he didn’t know how to cope with them.

He tried his best to integrate with society, strived to feel equal to his human colleagues and friends, but half the time felt it was just a charade. Really, he didn’t know what he was doing. 

Sometimes he didn’t think he’d ever really fit in. ‘Fake it ‘til you make it,’ you would tell him jokingly. But it was hardly a laughing matter to him. Not human, but deviant- he didn’t know what to make of his newfound place in the world. More than anything, he just wanted to feel… normal again.

“Y/N?” 

Lazily you crane your neck over to look at him, a brow arched questioningly.

He looked pensive, nervous even- the deviant’s hands fidgeting in his lap. You waited for him to continue, but he bit his lip silently. In that moment, he appeared quite human.

You sit up and shift around, fully facing him with your legs folded under you.

“Connor?”

“I… Do you ever, I mean…” You watched him struggle to find his wording, and reach out to gently squeeze his shoulder in a gesture you hoped was comforting. He met your eyes, your face expressing concern.

“What’s the matter?”

Eyes darting all over the place, the android attempted to gather his thoughts into coherency.

“Will I ever feel… normal?”

Your brows furrow, but your gentle smile doesn’t make him feel discouraged.  
“What do you mean?”

Connor isn’t even sure if _he_ knows what he means. These.. emotions, these flaws in his code, bits of rebel programming, had him twisted up inside. As if he could feel it in his core. It was hard to find the words to express this sensation. How could intangible feelings produce such physical distress? 

“Ever since, well, you know… I- I have all these emotions. I don’t understand them. The feeling is… unsettling.” His whole body seems to have become tense, anxious. “I don’t know how to feel. I don’t feel… normal.”

You nod slowly, you think you know what he’s getting at, even with his difficulty expressing it- especially given the subject at hand. After a few beats of staring at each other in silence, you sigh, blinking slowly.

“Look, Connor,” your hand slowly moving from his shoulder to rest on the top of his arm, “There is no such thing as normal. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”

The LED on his temple flickers, as if he’s carefully processing what you said.  
You and your figures of speech. His own speech was growing less formal and _robotic_ all the time, and in moments like these, you get a sense that he’s being more fleshed out as his own person. Straying further and further from simply a machine... from his intended purpose, to find one of his own. But when he doesn’t say anything, you attempt to clarify.

“Normal is an illusion. There’s no right or wrong way to be… to be normal. Everyone experiences life differently, has different opinions, different standards.”

The android looks away from you, up to the night sky, the yellow light still flashing steadily.

“Normal is relative to _you._ You’ll find your own ‘normal’ in time. I mean, _everyone_ struggles with finding their identity at some point,” and with that he quickly looks back at you, perhaps surprised? You hold back a bit of laughter.  
“Yeah, yeah. Even humans.”

This seemed placate him at least a little, his shoulders becoming more slack as he loses some of his tension. 

“...What about you?”

The question catches you off guard, and for a moment you just blink, wide eyed.  
And then with a shrug, you lean back on the truck window once more.

“I suppose I know who I am, what I am… most of the time anyways.” Try as you might, you can’t help the small laugh at his curious expression. 

“But I’ve had a lot of time to figure myself out. You’ll get there.” You pat his arm comfortingly and then slowly, move your hand over his, letting your fingers intertwine. With a soft smile, you look him in the eyes. This time, he seemed more at ease, more certain.  
“There’s no rush.”


End file.
